Music fans! Are you illin’ fo’ the shizzle? Need some phat beats for your ride? Check out Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

It’s tizzy fizzle! I think.

10. Back to the Shit – Millie Jackson

The eagerly-awaited follow up to Millie’s No.1 hit Pissed Myself Again is a toilet-tastic album of shit-hot hit dance anthems! The perfect soundtrack to those extended meetings with WC, you’ll be jiving on the john to tracks including:

* Ho’s Gotta Go
* Check This Shit Out (Featuring Pee Diddy)
* Bling My Ring
* Pump It Up (Call the Plumber)
* I Wouldn’t Go In There Just Yet

Guaranteed to go straight to no.2 in the Poop Charts!

Next time on Hit Parade… Call Doctor House – this record needs resuscitation!

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Music fans! Need to brighten up your miserable existence with a jolly jig or a dollop of jizzy jazz? Thank the Lord for Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Get jiggy with it!

9. Music to Help Clean Up Stream Pollution By

Does your local river glow in the dark? Kiddies got the squits after playing in the stream? Grab your chemical suit and this eco-riffic folk album and prepare to go GREEN!

Features performances from vegan militants Angry Tofu, the very green Nelly Tinkle’s’ Bean Explosion and fish fanciers Axl Moby and the Dicks. Sing along as you sift out rotting fish and noxious algae!*

Organic free-range masterpieces include:

* Curd Is the Word
* Knit Me a Hemp Farm
* Crab on my Cock
* Die, Meat Suckers!
* Beans and Broccoli (Ballard of Pepto Bismol)
* Winkle on my Winkle

*Record player may not function outdoors; purchase long cable or diesel generator for optimum performance.

Next time on Hit Parade… a record that really is shit!

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Music fans! Confused by the choice at your local record store? Want to get ‘with it’ and ‘hip’ like all the cats at the local Hop? Or something? Check out Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Prepare to get all folked-up with this folking awesome LP!

8. Folk Songs for the 21st Century

The 21st century may seem like a long way off now, but think of the fun we’ll have in the future! Space travel will be as easy as catching a bus, holidays to Jupiter will be commonplace, and we’ll all have personal robots to cook our meals and provide intimate pleasure!

Star trekkin’ troubadour Sheldon has travelled all the way back from the 21st century to share his “folk of the future” with us! Hyperspace-hopping hits include:

* The Green, Green Grass of Alpha Death Star Z-71
* My Dirty Ro-Bo Ho
* My Lover From Venus, She Had a Penis
* Jizzy Spacesuit Blues
* A Piddle on the Moon
* Cock Rocket (That’s She Called Me)

Can’t wait 100 years for Sheldon’s next cosmic collection? Simply get yourself cryogenically frozen – make sure you defrost in time for his next out-of-this-world long playing album!

Next time on Hit Parade… songs to clean up river pollution by! No really. It’s an album full of songs to clean up river pollution by.

Look, I don’t record the bloody things.

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Music fans! Need to brighten up your miserable existence with a jolly jig or a dollop of juicy jazz? Thank the Lord for Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Get jizzy with it!

7. Anchor’s Away! Captain Hook and His Pirates

Shiver me timbers and suck me cockles! You’ll will have a scurvy-licious time listening to the Cap’n and his hearty high-seas shanties! Real-life pirate Captain Randy Hook and his first mate Annie MacMuffin welcome you ‘all aboard’ their fantasy ship stuffed to the rafters with friendly pirates and barrels of booty!

Hook’s musical pieces of eight include:

* Pat the Pirate’s Special Sword
* Going Down on the Good Ship Molly
* A Stormy Night and a Rough Ride
* The Tale of Salty Seaman Jack
* A Jolly Roger
* Jig Around My Mast

Kids will also love the FREE eye patch included with this musical marvel, and give them hours of rollicking one-eyed fun. Arrrrrr!

Next time on Hit Parade: The space-time continuum gets all fucked up with a folk singer from… THE FUTURE!

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