20 Books You Shouldn’t Read on Public Transport
1. Horse Porn: A History
2. You and Ebola
3. The Hitman’s Handbook
4. Rophynol – A Buyers Guide
5. Wet Nursing Your Grandchildren
6. Pump Him Hard
7. Make It Look Like An Accident
8. Fodor’s Top Ten Whores of Old Amsterdam
9. Pisstory – The History of Public Washrooms
10. Living With Sores
11. Bus Crash: A Pictorial Journey
13. Jihad Made Easy
14. Grow Your Own Brain Worms
15. 30-Day Tripe Diet
16. Kill It, Strip It, Wear It
17. A Red Nose and A Strap-On: Diary of A Sex Clown
18. Human Trafficking for Dummies
19. Cooking Cats the Italian Way
20. Hairy Potter and the Cock Ring of Doom
Is it acceptable to read Pisstory in public washrooms?
Aww, the 30 Day Tripe Diet is such a good read too!
Ah, let us learn from Tiggy’s personal mistakes in-transit… 🙂
is that cooking cats italian available on tape?
“3. The Hitman’s Handbook”
No one would bother you with this book though…
Very funny post, Tiggy! I’d actually like copies of Cooking Cats the Italian Way and Living With Sores. Are they available for the Kindle?
I once made the mistake of reading Seduction By Way of Meth on the subway. Now there’s picture of me in picture transport with a big red line through it.
Brain worms? You can feed your brain a can of worms?
That’s some generally good advice, but I have to disagree with you on a couple of them. I frequently read “You and Ebola” or “The Hitman’s Handbook” on crowded busses, streetcars and subways. I find that I always get a seat and plenty of room to spread my legs (short though they may be) and stretch out if I so choose.
I thought that ‘Cooking Cats the Italian way” would be popular. I wish I’d bought the rights when they were offered to me …..
I am often afraid to been seen in public with some of my research materials (The History of Fornication, for example –yes, real book).
Your list makes mine look tame.
Hitman’s Handbook is a real book. I ordered it from Amazon before it got banned because of protests. Then I threw it out a couple years ago because I realized it was stupid. I just looked online. I probably could have made some money selling it on eBay.
Are the rest of the books for real, too? I think the tripe diet has already worked for me by convincing me not to have lunch. I’d love to read Hairy Potter on the subway. I might get a reaction, even in this town.
But wouldn’t it be fun to dare someone to sit on the Tube holding it open? Like one of them Candid Camera-type shows.
These are hilarous. I like to read “Serial Killing for Dummies” when I’m on the train…
Great list. You’re hilarious! And such wonderful organizing skills, too: the fact that I read #5, Wet Nursing Your Grandchildren, then #6, Pump Him Hard, made me laugh out loud. Ah, timing.