Tag: Shopping Bizarre

Tiggy’s Shopping Bizarre – UFO Detector

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Missed another flying saucer sighting? Make sure you’re first in the Close Encounters queue with this space-age UFO Detector, a bargain at only $69 of your Earth dollars!

No anal probes for you with this UFO detection unit!

 

* Its powerful radar scans the sky for extra-terrestrials lurking up to 25 miles away!

*A flashing light will activate when the approaching interplanetary fleet is detected. Probably.

* The detector’s compact size means you can take it camping, to the mall, in the shower – and it’s quicker than waiting for that ‘mutilated dead cow’ calling card those crazy aliens love to leave!

 

 But wait! There’s more! You too can be a ghost-busting hero with the incredible super-high-tech Ghost Detector!

It's a spooktacular gift for kids!

* This state-of-the-art device alerts you whenever a headless horseman or murdered Victorian housemaid floats by.

A great gift for impressionable young children. Boo!

 

Share your alien anal probe stories over at Humor-Blogs.com


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Tiggy’s Shopping Bizarre – Portable Hot Tub

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Hot Tub Heaven - of course you don't look stupid!

There’s nothing finer than sitting in your garden taking a bath in a luminous orange cauldron. This go-anywhere futuristic Dutch tub (not to be confused with a Dutch cap, which is somewhat smaller) is a great way to socialize with friends, neighbours and naked men.

 

We come in peace! To bang your leaf blower!* You’ll be a hot tub hit at the local Salvation Army hostel this Christmas! Simply fill the tub with soup and ladle some festive cheer to the homeless. Afterwards, fill it with hot soapy water and treat your tramping chums to a refreshing soak before pushing them back onto the mean streets.

* Turn the tub upside down and bury it in your neighbour’s garden. Call the local TV station and tell them a UFO has crash-landed next door and a giant purple alien is trying to have sex with their lawn mower. Better call the cops too, this will be a great YouTube moment.

 

There’s a sexy hot tub party every night at Humor-Blogs.com


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Tiggy’s Shopping Bizarre – Omelette Wizard

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It's Toss-Tastic!!

Chefs! Why use a pan to make an omelette when you can use another pan? The Omelette Wizard makes that most difficult of culinary challenges a piece of cake! Simply pour in beaten eggs and flip the pan – instead of the omelette! It’s nearly magic, but not quite.

Don’t stop there! Even hunky TV chef Anthony Bourdain would be envious of your cooking ability as you use Omelette Wizard to conjure up a variety of delicious dinners including

* Omelettes with stuff in them, like cheese!
* Fancy foreign pancakes including Crape Suzette
* Bacon and fish sticks turned to perfection

Don't let your old pan drive you to drink!

Great for camping and the cottage, the pans can be easily dismantled to create a super fun set of badminton racquets! (Shuttlecock not included).


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Tiggy’s Shopping Bizarre – Fake Corpses

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Shopping on the internet is fun! From the comfort of your own home, you can browse millions of stores and buy all sorts of stuff you don’t really need.

I’m featuring some of the toppermost of the shoppermost must-have items here at Tiggy’s Shopping Bizarre! And there’ll be even more junk appearing at a brand spanking new website – coming soon!

 

CORPSES FOR SALE – They’re Not Real! I Think.

Margaret Thatcher never looked so good!

Corpses For Sale provides a one-stop-shop for all your necrotic needs. Browse through an extensive selection of realistic stiffs (not being familiar with real-life dead people I couldn’t vouch for their authenticity).

Customize your corpse’s degree of decay! Buy it a nice wig! Imagine the hours of pleasure your personal cadaver will bring.

 

* Take corpsey for a ride so you can use the car pool lane. If you get caught by the police just tell them you are taking your grandmother to a funeral – hers. It will raise a smile with the cops and they will let you off. Probably.

* As a hilarious yet harmless prank, bury it in your neigbour’s garden and call the cops. Don’t forget to film it for YouTube!

* Hide an eye or rotting finger in your kid’s school lunch box. Imagine how adorable they will look as they scream in terror and piss themselves in front of their friends in the dinner hall. Precious!

 


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