Category: Hit Parade

Tiggy’s Hit Parade: Futuristic Folk Songs of the Future!

Music fans! Confused by the choice at your local record store? Want to get ‘with it’ and ‘hip’ like all the cats at the local Hop? Or something? Check out Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Prepare to get all folked-up with this folking awesome LP!

OMG, space and rocket ships and folk!

8. Folk Songs for the 21st Century

The 21st century may seem like a long way off now, but think of the fun we’ll have in the future! Space travel will be as easy as catching a bus, holidays to Jupiter will be commonplace, and we’ll all have personal robots to cook our meals and provide intimate pleasure!

Star trekkin’ troubadour Sheldon has travelled all the way back from the 21st century to share his “folk of the future” with us! Hyperspace-hopping hits include:

* The Green, Green Grass of Alpha Death Star Z-71
* My Dirty Ro-Bo Ho
* My Lover From Venus, She Had a Penis
* Jizzy Spacesuit Blues
* A Piddle on the Moon
* Cock Rocket (That’s She Called Me)

Can’t wait 100 years for Sheldon’s next cosmic collection? Simply get yourself cryogenically frozen – make sure you defrost in time for his next out-of-this-world long playing album!

Next time on Hit Parade… songs to clean up river pollution by! No really. It’s an album full of songs to clean up river pollution by.

Look, I don’t record the bloody things.


Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinteresttumblrmail

Tiggy’s Hit Parade: Pirate Pranks and Salty Seamen!

Music fans! Need to brighten up your miserable existence with a jolly jig or a dollop of juicy jazz? Thank the Lord for Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Get jizzy with it!

Cock Pirates

7. Anchor’s Away! Captain Hook and His Pirates

Shiver me timbers and suck me cockles! You’ll will have a scurvy-licious time listening to the Cap’n and his hearty high-seas shanties! Real-life pirate Captain Randy Hook and his first mate Annie MacMuffin welcome you ‘all aboard’ their fantasy ship stuffed to the rafters with friendly pirates and barrels of booty!

Hook’s musical pieces of eight include:

* Pat the Pirate’s Special Sword
* Going Down on the Good Ship Molly
* A Stormy Night and a Rough Ride
* The Tale of Salty Seaman Jack
* A Jolly Roger
* Jig Around My Mast

Kids will also love the FREE eye patch included with this musical marvel, and give them hours of rollicking one-eyed fun. Arrrrrr!

Next time on Hit Parade: The space-time continuum gets all fucked up with a folk singer from… THE FUTURE!


Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinteresttumblrmail

Tiggy’s Hit Parade: Fingerfuch am Disco Party!

Music fans! Are you illin’ fo’ the shizzle? Need some phat beats for your ride? Check out Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

It’s tizzy fizzle! I think.

Oooh! Ricke Low's Orkester!

6. Kjell Kraghe Featuring Ricke Low’s Orkester! Or something!

James Last and his Orchestra too highbrow? Looking for an eclectic Euro pops album with a cool synth vibe? Kjell Kraghe is the genius behind Vind I Selgnbthing, featuring Ricke Low’s Orkester (a bit like an symphony orchestra, but with more hair).

Non-stop Eurozone disco fun includes:

* Ich Bin Sexy Love Boat
* Hot Dog, Hot Dog
* Lumpen Pants Gestuffen
* Hajj Hajj Happy Pis!
* Fingerfuch am Disco Party

The album cover is a work of art! By the wonders of Photoshop wizardry, Kjell-baby appears to be rising from the sea like a polyester-clad Neptune. Es gut, ja!

Thanks to Worst Album Covers for this masterpiece of LP art.

Next time on Hit Parade: Shiver me timbers and lash me cockles… It’s Pirate Pops!


Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinteresttumblrmail

Tiggy’s Hit Parade: Puppet Pranks with Harry and Terry!

Music fans! Confused by the choice at your local record store? Want to get ‘with it’ and ‘hip’ like all the cats at the local Hop? Or something? Check out Tiggy’s Hit Parade!

(Unfortunately, Tiggy doesn’t possess a turntable or any musical knowledge, so all reviews are entirely fictional).

Let’s rock around the cock!

A puppet show... in audio! Hmmm.

5. Harry and Terry

Attention fans of freaky little mechanical puppets! Top ventriloquist Terry and his little woody friend bring you the finest in voice-throwing fun… you won’t even see his lips move!

This amazing record showcases the talented duo’s spectacular routine including:

* Tap dancing – boy, that little wooden fella can move!
* Magic tricks! Pick a card, any card…
* Terry drinks a glass of water while Harry sings a song – you won’t believe your ears!
* A rousing rendition of their 1988 chart-topping hit I’m Inside My Best Friend
* A fabulous finale with dancing showgirls and a unicycling hamster

Hopefully a video version of the show will be released in the future.

Thanks to Worst Album Covers for their toppermost of the poppermost record collection.

Next time on hit parade… break out your polyester pants and glitterball for a spec-tacular Eurozone disco sensation!


Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditpinteresttumblrmail