The Lunenburg County Bugler’s top columnist shakes his fist and rants about all the things that would get him fired if he wrote about it in the Lunenburg County Bugler.

Me and Prime Minister Stephen Harper agree on one thing. The Arts are rubbish! So-called ‘artists’ waste their time splattering paint about and poncing around on stage, when they could be doing useful jobs like building cars and running banks!

Tonight I have to review a play at the local arts theatre. The play is billed as “An intimate study of one woman’s journey through life and spirituality, reflected against the backdrop of social turmoil and political strife in 1960s Belfast”. Gahhhh!

Why are plays always about dramatic spiritual journeys and social turmoil? Why can’t they be about monkeys or something? I’d like to see a play about monkeys.

Tomorrow I have to attend an open night at the local Gallery of Modern Art. They have nibbles, which is the main reason I’m going. But how am I going to make polite conversation with the fancy art crowd about this:

Rabbits... teeth... erm...

Apparently, this work is a study of the symbolic progression of climate change as perceived through the eyes of nature…. I can see rabbits. With boobs? Are those things pretzels? What?

The stray cats at the local dump have created better art than that! No really, they have:

Lol, cat art.

Not bad for a first attempt, Tiddles!

Ohhh, I’m so cross I’m going to set fire to the Fire Station and call it Art. Ta-ta!


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8 Responses to “Guest Poster – Eddie McMayonnaise On Modern Art!”

How much will Tiddles accept for that painting, lol?

Come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind a good play about monkeys, either.

Shawn’s last blog post..Yahoo Chat: A Cautionary Tale

I must admit I have never been able to develop a taste for modern art.

You have not helped me overcome it.

Stephanie Barr’s last blog post..Ah, Shakespeare’s Time

Modern art is so sucky. I like paintings you buy from the starving artist sales. You know those real nice ones you hang over your sofa?

ettarose’s last blog post..Enhance your vocabulary!

Another vote here for the monkey play!!

Rabbits with boobs… and giftwrapped genitalia, it appears…

The symbolism for sex in our society such that it’s.. erm…

Sorry, I just had some flashbacks to my college art appreciation class. Can’t go on.

Jenn Thorson’s last blog post..Hide the Children, Subversive Cabbages are Here!

Play about monkeys sound fun or is it those watching plays aren’t that fun 🙂
And well done to Tiddles, how much does that one cost?

You just have to get used to modern art to appreciate the beauty of it!

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